Sunday, December 30, 2007

Christmas with the Rothschilds

We sat around the table for Christmas dinner. My Aunt finally finished decorating their vacation home with things she acquired during her travels. My favorite piece by far, was the crystal chandelier from Europe. I always loved how it just twinkled. Anyway, there were 7 of us—my Mom, Dad, Aunt Iris and her husband Uncle Herbert, Aunt Cecilia and her husband Uncle Vincent and of course me. It was like a meeting of Filipinas who married White husbands. I think the Moet started to take its effect on me when I began asking questions about my cousin Anna—his daughter from a previous marriage.

Me: “Uncle Herb, How’s Anna? I though she’d be here.”

Uncle Herbert: “She’s fine. Just busy. She’s been through a lot this year.”

Aunt Iris: “Yes. She’s a LESBIAN now.”

The table became silent. Aunt Cecilia looked at me I looked at her and everyone just started to look at everyone else and see how they would react.

Then my Mom said, “So long as she’s happy. That’s the important thing.”
Wonder if she’ll react the same way when she finds out about me.

Thank God Uncle Vincent changed the subject by talking about his upcoming trip to Africa. My Aunt Cecelia talked about her new shoes and my Mom talked about her new Dian Von Furstenberg dress which I bought for her. We ended the evening by sitting around the fire and sipping cognac. We discussed politics and my uber-conservative Wall Street Republican, Uncle Herbert, dropped the second shock: He would vote for a Democrat. There is HOPE for us all.

Boring eh? What’d you expect from a couple of bankers? I was stuck in a Martha Stewart Christmas. Henessy was excellent though. I was half drunk during the dinner. The cognac made it worse.

The next day, I had a bad hangover, and the eating did not cease. Uncle Karl would be upset.
The Uncles wanted to play golf and I had no choice but to say yes.

I am a bad golfer. Very bad. I must’ve shot the ball into the woods 8 times, including driving it *into* the water hazards. At least I got to wear my Izod apparel again with matching golf cap.

~ ~ ~
Sam called me on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. He tells me how much he misses me and I reciprocate. I haven’t orgasmed since he left. I’m saving it up. LOLz. This relationship makes me anxious. He’s so out of my league. I just KNOW this isn’t going to have a happy ending.

Then again, I can’t help but dream of having him next to me during Christmas dinner and I just know he would hold my hand underneath the table.

Oh well.

4 comments:

Quentin X said...

Wait until they start asking questions like: have you got a girlfriend yet or when are you getting married?
I'm so glad I don't have to endure that anymore.

chase / chubz said...

a lesbian aunt>? wow, that would have been a pretty interesting topic to discus in the table..
hehehe

John Halcyon von Rothschild said...

@Quentin- i'm still young to be getting THOSE questions, but i'm afraid time is running out.

@Chase- she's my cousin. yup. she's a lesbian...for now at least. she does have a baby from a previous relationship.

Anonymous said...

Family gatherings an updates, i wonder what topics will be lined up for this year. :)