I saw The Dark Knight today with Sam. Needless to say, I'm sure all you heard how wonderful it was--the best Batman movie ever, etc.
During the movie, I was shocked. Shocked that he put his hand on top of mine and held it there til the movie ended. I don't think I can go down that road again. I admit that for sometime since we broke up, I've been lonely.
I do keep busy with work as it has gotten more complex. But late at night, when I lie in bed I miss him hugging me. I miss waking up next to someone. I know things won't ever go back to what they were. It'd be all too easy to just get back together though. But I can never give him what he wants, at least not now.
Because I am a coward.
I am sorry Sam.