Monday, 24 November 2008

Ft. Lauderdale

On Halloween weekend, my bestest friend got in an auto accident. Naturally, I rushed to his side to aid and comfort him as any good friend should. The car was totally wrecked, yet he survived with only scratches on his head and hands from the shards of glass. Seeing that he was fine, we decided to take a road trip to his newly-bought house in Ft. Lauderdale.

When we got there, three hours later, he remembered that the keys to the house were in his car. The one that got wrecked. So we decided to check into the nearest hotel I can find. We ended up at the Il Lugano.
It was probably one of the nicest boutique hotels I've ever stayed in. The rooms were fabulous.

They even had Bulgari bath amenities!

Anyway, we ended up at Dudes, a gay bar across the street and my friend hooked up with this couple looking for a threesome. I decided to just walk around and see Ft. Lauderdale on Halloween night. Then I saw him.

He was a blond blue-eyed eye candy. Tall,lean, yet muscular, with his hair spiked up. He approached me. He invited me back into Dudes where he bought me a drink. I was drunkety drunk drunk drunk 4 shots later. We decided to go to to my hotel room. Once there, we decided to do the deed. He rimmed me and I rimmed him...something I thought I would never ever do! And for the first time ever, I gave up my ehem...cherry. Yes. I had hot anal sex with a hot Russian. He was the first one who I allowed to f*ck me. At first it was painful, but it felt good after a while. His c*ck was HUGE! It must've been at least 9. He kept saying how sexy I was and kept nibbling on my ear. I loved it! I really shed all my hang ups and discovered that sex with total strangers is FANTASTIC! So thank you B! Thanks for a wonderful time!

Friday, 14 November 2008

Sex Ettiquette

To the guy who I met last Wednesday night:

I do realize that NSA sex is just that. But please for the love of GOD follow these simple rules if you ever want to get laid.

1. Shower before meeting a potential sex partner.
I took the time to shower and clean every orifice. I sprayed myself with Dolce and Gabbana and smelled damned good. But you smelled like feces. You could have at least showered. I could smell the BO and it was definitely not a turn on.

2. Clean your house.
I thought gay men were suppose to be neat and tidy. You weren't. There was cat poop on your carpet! The smell of your house was overwhelming. It was a mixture of cat urine and cat poop. I wanted to puke.

3. No means NO!
When I say "this isn't happening", Don't chase after me. Even if you looked like Brad Pitt, but smelled like SHIT, I will NOT blow you.

Thanks for a ruined night. I knew I should have said yes to the other guy who showed me a face pic!